Stormtrooper Toaster: Creates a breakfast for champions

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If there is one thing that Stormtroopers are pretty lousy at in the Star Wars universe, it would be this: they have terrible aim. They do not seem to be able to shoot to save their lives, although we presume that Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens has somewhat remedied that situation with Kylo Ren helming his own group and Captain Phasma keeping things in check. Perhaps they lack getting proper nutrition of toast and eggs. The $59.95 Stormtrooper Toaster might just be the tonic for them to start the day right and uplift morale.

This toaster confirms one’s unwavering loyalty to the Galactic Empire, where slices of bread will be indelibly browned with the Imperial Crest. It will arrive in the form of the ubiquitous Stormtrooper’s helmet, as it serves as a literal example and metaphorical icon of Imperial imprinting. With the Stormtrooper Toaster, you will end up with identically marked split buns, muffins, and waffles with an obedient fervor, and there is also a removable crumb tray to ensure an orderly breakfast station.

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