The Shooting Cubicle Alarm System adds a level of pro-activity to whoever sneaks around your cubicle whenever you’re absent in body.

Each unit has an ever-watchful motion sensor. The first line of defense is lovingly referred to as Alarm 1. When Alarm 1 is tripped two very important things happen. First, it flashes and klaxons to signal an intrusion. But (and this is the kicker) it also arms Alarms 2 and 3 using invisible wireless signals. Alarm 2 also has an audible alarm, but it is louder than Alarm 1. It also will spot the varmint with a red light beam. Alarm 3 is the coolest; when it is tripped two safe (but surprising) missiles will be launched at the now-fleeing interloper. You valuables will be safe, your cubicle will be secure, and your foe will be embarrassed enough to leave your stapler alone for good!

Just make sure that all seven AAA batteries required to power the Shooting Cubicle Alarm System are adequately juiced up. You can pick up one of these for $39.99 from ThinkGeek.